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What are your convictions?

10:58:00 AM Pia Thought 0 Comments

Being single is new to me.

Embarrassing as it is, singleness has been a long lost friend. Glad that we reunited a couple of months ago. Haha!
To those who didn’t know, I just broke up from a relationship I was dying to save three months ago.
After that one painful day when I took that leap of faith, it has marked the start of the glorious day of my singleness journey. It opened the door to the unexplored world of new relationships, new goals, new passions, and new discoveries about myself.
And there I met a new found friend, convictions.
Honestly, convictions are new to me. I never even thought about this before. Yikes!
It is actually just this night when I wrote these convictions and prayed over it. So, hooray to this new season!

First, what is conviction?

con·vic·tion
kənˈvikSH(ə)n/
noun
a firmly held belief or opinion.

Here are my convictions:

1. The 11PM no contact rule

I am a very emotional person.
All emotions are pouring out beyond this time. So, I will not entertain any messages or calls from a guy beyond 11 pm aside from emergencies or if the need arises.
Let me start this one by telling you a sad story.
After a chat with a guy friend which ended at 12 midnight, I need to check some details on our previous conversation. While looking for it, I read how I communicated. I saw my long, full of emotions chat messages. And pained me. I was embarrassed. Did I really say this? Did I really mention that? Boy, I needed to pray over it right then and there.
Guess I poured out everything to this guy friend when I have everything to just stop, talk to God, write it on a blog, or sleep instead.
Though the conversation is not about ‘us’ or about ‘flings’, I feel like I gave him something which is not really advisable for a single lady who just got out of a bad relationship. I just poured all my emotions over chat and I think it’s not healthy.
Don’t get me wrong, I can always talk to a guy friend about something. But over chat, at midnight? I know we can talk about it some other time or in broad daylight when my emotions are not that intense.
And this didn’t just happen once or twice. It happened countless times already and I thank God for really, really reminding me about guarding my heart.

2. Always go back to God in this healing process

Sure, all those mountains I climbed, friends I made, church activities I have completed somehow helped me forget my aching heart, but then God reminded me to always seek Him in this healing process.
No amount happy memories from travels and worldly activities can heal my broken heart because it is in Him alone that I will find healing and restoration.
There was this month when I just thought I am completely set free from the bondage of that past. I thought feelings were just part of the story already and that I have finished the healing process that quick.
Mind you, after a number of calls and texts from my ex, I slowly began to feel the same pain again. I was crying out to God.
“God, I thought you healed me already? Can we just go out of this already?”, I said.
Though I proclaimed that God is my Healer, and He makes all things new, I was dumbfounded when I hear Him reply to my plea, “Daughter, why in a hurry? Let’s take everything slow. See these dusts? See these ashes? We will create wonderful, beautiful, and new memories together out of these pains, out of your tears. I will mend your broken heart as promised. But this time, we will take it slowly but beautifully, you and me.”
God reminded me that slowing down the healing process is actually beautiful.It is not about how fast you’re heart mended or how many months and years you’ve been in the healing process.
It is about how faithful and loving God is for never leaving our side during the journey.

3. Don’t pour out everything over chat to your guy friends

It is lovelier to talk about life, faith, and everything in between in person, right?
Why not reserve these stories when you and your guy friends has set the time to meet? Besides, pouring out everything will eventually lead to opening hearts which can lead to immature emotions.
This time, I would really want to guard my heart.

4. Don’t just take anyone who wants to enter your life

5. No stalking, please.

My friends know how I am really good at this.
Really good that this helped me know secrets that I never should have known. But yes, guarding my heart now means stop stalking. Let’s not feed our emotions immaturely.

6. Wake up at 6AM -- and see the promise of mornings

I love mornings.
It is one great reminder for me of Psalm 30:5. “..weeping may stay for the night, but rejoicing comes in the morning.”
(updating)

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